Pinkie Swears and French Toast Sticks

The lunch negotiations go on… Today, this was the school lunch menu. I am firmly of the opinion that if there is one dessert day a month at the primary school that I should enthusiastically agree to let my children buy lunch on that day. This is supported by research that indicates that one of the parental behaviors directly linked to childhood obesity is denying your child highly desirable foods. The idea coming from the research is that if parents restrict access to desirable foods, the child will overcompensate when the food is later made available. (Here is the link to Kyung Rhee’s article in The ANNALS of the American Academy of Political and Social Science.) This makes the assumption that the rice krispie treats that call themselves “dessert” at the kids’ school are, in fact, highly desirable. However, I have it on good authority that they ARE. Also, I think it’s mean to make a child watch her friends all eating a rice krispie treat while she munches on the carrot sticks that her mother put in her lunch box. Such acts are not soon forgotten by first graders.

So, it was predetermined that my darling Maggie would be buying lunch yesterday. (Ellie did not get to partake because it was not one of her days to go to kindergarten.) However, the negotiating began when I looked at the menu and (correctly) surmised that Maggie would want to choose the least appealing entrée. Look at the picture – you know what she wanted to get, right? (Yes, French toast sticks.)

Some background information: The head of nutrition services in our school district (we’ll call her Jill) is close friends with my friend, Melissa. Melissa and I were talking recently about cafeteria food. She is a school teacher in another district, and she told me about a conversation that she had had with Jill specifically about the French toast sticks that are in the repertoire of many school cafeterias, specifically, those managed by Sodexo in the Pacific Northwest. I have respect for the work the Sodexo folks do, but occasionally, there are decisions that are, well, not the same decisions I would make. Melissa asked Jill about the French toast sticks, which are served with syrup, and which Melissa finds send her students into thrashing sugar highs and subsequent crashes as the afternoon progresses. “Why,” Melissa wondered, "must the syrup flow so freely around said French toast sticks? Why not serve them plain or even with a dusting of powdered sugar, rather than give the students an open invitation to unmonitored syrup?” Jill responded that without the syrup, the French toast sticks would not meet their caloric requirements for the meal. Melissa asked, “Why not serve them with some fresh fruit instead?” As one can guess, it is more cost effective to serve them with syrup – and it meets the guidelines they follow for the meal.

Am I teaching her valuable life skills by negotiating? I wanted to let Maggie buy on dessert day, but did not want her entrée to also be, for all intents and purposes, dessert as well. Here’s where the negotiating began. It was 6:15 in the morning.

Maggie: If I can’t have French toast for lunch, will you make me French toast for breakfast?

Me: Yes. (At least then I can control the real maple syrup and make the French toast with whole wheat bread.) But, what ARE you going to eat for lunch? If I were you, I’d get the turkey sandwich or the Asian chicken salad. I don’t even want to think that you would eat French toast for breakfast and then go eat it again for lunch. We’d have to stop buying lunch altogether if that ever happened.

Maggie: Remember when you asked me not to get chocolate milk and I got white milk instead?

Me: Yes, I do. Thank you for that. It makes me so sad that they sell the kids chocolate milk every day.

Ellie (joining the conversation): I NEVER get white milk! I always get CHOCOLATE milk! I LOVE chocolate milk! EVERYBODY in my kindergarten class gets chocolate milk!

Me: Yes, I know. I wish you always got white milk, but you are able to make your own decisions on days when you buy lunch. I have to just hope that you’ll make smart choices.

Maggie: I will get white milk, and you should, too, Ellie.

Me: Thanks. Now, how are we going to make sure that you get what you told me you’ll get for lunch today? Should we pinkie swear?

Maggie: Okay, we’ll pinkie swear. (We pinkie swear.) Mama, what happens if you break a pinkie swear?

Me: I don’t know, I’ve never broken a pinkie swear. Something bad, I guess.

Maggie: Does someone cut off your finger?

Me: I doubt it, but like I said, I’ve never broken a pinkie swear…

Photo: www.littleburgundyshoes.com

Postscript: Maggie says she got the Asian chicken salad and that it was very good. She said the rice krispie treat was very small, but worth it.

Does anyone else have any thoughts (besides the pinkie swear) on how to encourage kids to eat well on days when they buy lunch at school? How about on kids being able to buy chocolate milk every day? Here is a link to a powerful TED video by Jamie Oliver in which, among other things, he illustrates exactly how much sugar our kids are getting from chocolate milk served in school cafeterias.